


Do I Wanna' Know

by Amberpseudoyo



Category: Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (1974), The Great Gatsby (2013)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Bottom Nick, Caretaking, Death, Depression, Eventual Smut, Fluff, M/M, Misunderstandings, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Suicidal Thoughts, but not rally, dead
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 08:52:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3971695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amberpseudoyo/pseuds/Amberpseudoyo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There was no bullet in the end, thank god. Yes, no one was shot but there were plenty of unseen wounds. Scars and fractures that ran deep beneath our persons, slowly chipping away at the last dredges of sanity we were desperately clinging to. And when it all came to a head, Jays ring slipped from his finger. Allowing a small clack of metal against marble to conclude the final act of whatever horrific dream-turned-awry I had been dragged into.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do I Wanna' Know

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic and I'm definitely ready for the long haul on this one. I probably wont update as much as I should so if you ever notice I've been slacking, comment below. As usual, critiques are always welcome. /(#@w@#)/

After the incident at the hotel, Tom had been furious, demanding they leave immediately. However, Gatsby and Daisy had silently agreed they needed to regroup.And that I, for reasons unknown to me, even now, needed to be dragged along, acting as somewhat of a chauffeur as they exchanged mute gestures and glances to each other in the back of the car. Upon finally pulling up to the entrance of Gatsby's mansion a small commotion notified me that the two had swiftly exited the back and were hastily heading indoors. Thinking, that perhaps now would be the time that I should leave, I began to turn around and proceed back to my property, but not before a small hiss from Daisy was thrown out of the door. "Nicky! Come here.", as her face came into view, the only word that could accurately describe what she looked like, would've been pure, unbridled anxiety. The gentle slope of her nose was scrunched up horribly and her eyes briskly moved about as if unsure what to land on. She obviously didn't want to be alone so with post-haste I made my way up the grand steps and into the foyer. Being led by Daisy's quickly retreating form, I trailed numbly after the flashes of blue her dress happened to leave upon every corner that her body rushed past. When I finally managed to grab a glimpse of the entire attire, I noticed that she had stopped. We were now in the grand hall that the two of them had previously danced around in, the memories leaving a haze of happiness even for me. Looking about, I finally spotted Gatsby a peculiarly odd distance from us. Daisy most likely didn't notice, but I easily spotted the tremor beginning to start in his right hand. I had noticed it during Daisy's prior visit to my house, when she was to arrive for tea. Still, I stayed put as a very intricate dance began to form in front of me, something so intimate I almost began to revert to my tendency of feigning slumber or disinterest. Unfortunately I was, one, asked to be here and, two, standing up, so both options were immediately erased form my mind. I concluded I would just have to watch. Quietly, Daisy smiled and stepped towards Gatsby's forlorn form. "Jay?" she whispered, barely audible. 

"I'm terribly sorry for- for what happened. There, back at the hotel I mean." 

'"Oh, Jay I forgive you it's fine, really." she cooed. Now, this is one of the first of many things I would find odd in this conversation. Daisy had been equally at fault for what had transpired in the hotel, it wasn't solely an occurrence birthed from Gatsby alone. When the three of us had been together she had willingly admitted her love for him but for some odd reason, she refused to even hold hands with Jay in front of Tom, completely aware of all the numerous affairs he was obviously entangled in. Making, a rather confused gesture on my face, I silently shuffled forward. 

"Darling, I would never do such things to you, you must know… to punch him was just, anger and I-"

"Oh, Jay it… we're fine its all fine."

The slow lull of a late-summer breeze swept through the opened windows and Daisy began to delicately start towards Jay. 

"Daisy?" he suddenly questioned, halting her advance. "W-why didn't you, that is, hold my hand?"

The blanched face he received in return gave both him and I terribly disturbed nerves.

"It's um- well I'm just not ready for such a large change." she mumbled into her beaded necklace.

Gatsby nodded is head understandingly. I had a vague feeling that I no longer existed in whatever world they entered when the two of them met. "Actually, I do believe it would be the best ,if only for the media's sake, that we stopped seeing each other. At least for the time being." she finished finally glancing up. 

"No!" Gatsby suddenly shouted rising his arm in a pathetic attempt to reach her, reminding me of that night on the dock. "No, please I, just, for how long are you referring to?" he pleaded with desperation pooling in his eyes. 

"For quite a while I believe." she murmured.

Unbelievable.

"Daisy, you idiot!" I cried my arms flung wide. "Don't you realize why he did all of it? The parties, the glitz, the things he doesn't want them, doesn't need them he did it all for you!!"

My sudden outburst shattered the mirage they had built around themselves . Gatsby looked at me incredulously as Daisy lowered her head in obvious shame.

"Nick, I- I know it's jus-"

"Then why wont you give him an answer dammit!! I've barely known the man for a summer and even I can see the agony he's in. Make him happy. Don’t you want him to be happy, Daisy? Don’t you want to make yourself happy"

Silence filled the massive hall.

'I'm trying to help you two, cant you see that I want both of you to be happy but I cant make either of you happy if you wont be honest with yourselves!" I spat and quietly exited the hall. 

A silent minute passed. I dared to look back from the bleak veranda. 

"He's right. "Daisy muttered to herself more than Gatsby

"I don’t even know what I want any more she whispered."

"I've only wanted you." Jay mumbled

"Dammit, Jay you don’t even know who I am you keep romanticizing me making me out like this gorgeous starlet the only person who even came close to knowing how I felt was Nick and he's just caught in the middle of it all. "Daisy screeched before turning abruptly.

"Like I said before, he s right Jay I'm not playing tug-o-war with him as the rope anymore. I'm not inn love with you Jay. I may be in love with what you stand for or-or what you used to stand for but now I, I just want to be happy with myself. You're amazing Gatsby you really are but I'm just a girl. And in all honestly I just want it all to stop. Everything- just stop." she cried, whilst clutching desperately at her unruly locks of hair

Jay was paralyzed. 

"I see." Is all he could said, and just like that, whatever was left of the glamour that was once instilled in the grand mansion was gone. Swept away by the reality of it all, that the only remaining roles left in his melodramatic tale were two men trying to string together a puzzle. One wanting to reverse time, another desperately attempting to propel the others forward and at the heart of it all, a young woman who only wished she could freeze time all together. 

Jay's ring slipped from his finger. Allowing the small clack of metal against marble to conclude the final act of what ever horrific dream-turned-awry I had been dragged into.

"Goodbye." He voiced. Only an echo of himself

I did not attempt to look back after that but I managed to hear the small tak's of daisy's heels as she left. No sounds emanated from Gatsby's retreating form

I did not hear or see from him for a month and a half.

My days were spent meandering through job offers before coming upon a position in the paper of a local new office Of west egg who had recently acquired an opening, wanting a new writer for "Fresh Tales". A small writing column about fantasized stories usually read by daydreaming girls and adventurous young boys. Weeks proceeded by with only the hum of Ms. F and the clack of my typewriter. Daisy did not attempt to call or visit, neither did anyone of previous acquaintance. I wasn't too surprised. The quiet did good, allowed me to think. And thinking I was doing, when pulling into my driveway I noticed the door left ajar. Surely, Ms. F would not attempt to do such a thing. A burglar may-haps. As my mind jumped to the conclusions it so often does, I hastily retrieved a garden rake form a nearby bush and slowly entered the house. Trying my best to make little to no sound, I lightly stepped on the floral carpeting before hearing a loud thump emanate from upstairs. Dear god, was it an animal? 

A small melodic tune drifted down the stairs and my thought process was immediately cut short. A...drunk burglar?

The sound of crushed glass trickled into my ears and a sudden burst of anger and fear propelled me up the stairs.  
I began to stride toward the door the sounds were coming from before halting quite suddenly. The noises had stopped, and this- this was my room. 

No, it couldn't have been, Daisy maybe, or…god who knows. And with a final shake of my head I began to hesitantly push on the oak door making sure to place the garden rake at least 3 or 4 paces ahead of my person. Tensing, I latched heavily onto the meager weapon and took a small glance around the corner. Nothing. The shutters had been opened and the cotton linens floated eerily in the breeze billowing carelessly around the room covering all of my belongings in a haze of white.

Wait.

There, on the bed. The curtains delicately brushed back revealing a almost unnoticeable beige covering to be revealed. 

Silence, were they dead?

"Who are you?" I announced, poising myself for an altercation and directing the rakes head toward my bed as I fully stepped into the room. 

Again, nothing. I could hear breathing now though, but the movement of the curtains disrupted my line of sight.   
Slowly, as if dealing with a wild animal I poked the curtains out of the way and violently shot back at least 5 feet.

Again, nothing.

In one final act of bravado, I swept the opposite end of the rake flying across the bed, fully clearing the sinister linens from obstructing my sight any further.

My blood ran cold and I felt the strength in my legs suddenly give out. My mind sat like lead in my skull and I soon myself on my knees, taking in deep gulping breaths.

No, why, what? 

The questions consumed me and as my vision faded and I drifted from the surface of consciousness I uttered a simple two syllabic word.

"Gatsby?"


End file.
